Grumpy

I'm not terribly excited about the NCAA Tournament starting today, so I know something is off.

(Feel free to stop reading right now, because I'm just venting here. It's not really interesting stuff, so I apologize in advance. Thanks, and come again.)

My attitude about my job has swung squarely back into Negative, after a few months in Ambivalence. It's a shame I like (for the most part) the people I work with, because then I could just be down on the whole damn thing and say, "Screw it." But I was talking the other day with a relatively new hire in a different division, and we agreed that the corporate culture here is a major source of frustration.

Granted, this culture is a lot better than the one I came from -- we're paid and given raises based on merit (imagine that!). Of course, if you're a deadbeat that just means they give you a slightly smaller raise. But back to my point, which is that the corporate culture here seems to reward those who talk loudest and most often, even if they're just repeating what someone has just said.

I'm usually dinged on my evaluations for not "communicating" well and not exhibiting "leadership skills" (that is, not verbally expressing every single thought that enters my head.) This is mostly because I am trying to, you know, do my job, instead of constantly talking, butting in on every conversation, and celebrating the completion of any task that requires an above-average amount of effort as though I'd just cured cancer.

Maybe this is just a side effect of me not being used to being one of the most experienced people in my department. Or maybe it's just that this isn't the right work environment for me. At the least, I have a sliver of hope ahead, but I can't talk about it right now.